Low risk, high returns!

This is not financial advice
Don’t be stupid. Rather drink coffee and give me the cash you want to invest in these opportunities!

If you want lucrative returns on your investment, there is no better place than a scam. I mean, you want unregulated bitcoins to be working in your favour! These pyramid and Ponzi schemes I wrote about are worth your money (not)!

Steinhoff – step aside! Let’s assume (only for this post) that regulation is for the dogs – and for people that work with small change. 

WE WANT BIG RETURNS!

I want to be able to buy South Africa with a lucrative scam!

Did you know that the South African economy is worth about $283 billion? This is small change, and we will be chasing the big bucks. So, for this post, our aim is to have our investment to be the size of the South African economy. 

I am using this calculator to see how I should structure my finances for the returns and the formula (=(1+10%)^12 - 1,) to calculate the annual returns. It’s the same formula that I use when determining how much coffee I have to drink today.

How to maximise my lucrative scam profits

To make the most out of my scam profits, I need to either up the investment time, the money you put in or the rate of return (see this article for more info). 

As these wonderful opportunities are explicitly telling you their rate of return (%) and you don’t want to invest forever, I’ve capped it at 10 years. So, now is the question – how much money do I need to put in to buy SA in 10 years’ time?

Opportunity 1: “Green and Grey”

This wonderful opportunity came across  through someone I shall call “Mr. Z”. I want to make money, so it’s not about being safe. 

  • Initial investment: $ 120 000
  • Term: 10 years
  • Interest rate: 329.54 % / year
  • Final Result: $ 256 576 793 918.78

Opportunity 2: Mirror Trading International

When talking about opulent returns, we need to speak about MTI. This wonderful company provided modest returns of 10% per month (with the calculation (=(1+10%)^12 - 1,) it is a modest  214 %), which is just too awesome to be true! 

The screenshot is taken from Stealthy Wealth’s article on MTI here. You can tell that the deal isn’t even close to the previous one, so we’ll need to push in some serious money to make this financially worth our while.

  • Initial investment: $ 3 000 000
  • Term: 10 years
  • Interest rate: 10% / month (214% / year compounded monthly)
  • Final Result: $ 279 523 120 159.93

Opportunity 3: Amfeix

There is this billboard on the highway next to the N14 close to Centurion where Amfeix states it offers a 45% APR. Their website claims 4% per month. I think let’s be conservative and use the 4%. 

With some complicated calculations (=(1+4%)^12 - 1), we’re talking about a 60% per year interest rate. 

  • Initial investment: $ 2 300 000 000
  • Term: 10 years
  • Interest rate: 4% / month (60 % / year compounded monthly)
  • Final Result: $ 252 887 674 388.48

Conclusion

Can you imagine being able to grow your investment to buy South Africa? This is just phenomenal – and highly desirable.

I know it’s tempting to invest your money with scams that are not registered with the FSCA – but know that there are risks. 

Regulation is not only there for stifling growth, but also for protecting your investments.

As per Stealthy Wealth’s article, look out for these red lights:

  • Returns are quoted monthly
  • Your money is guaranteed safe
  • The organization is not registered with the FSCA

Have a diversified investment portfolio and manage your risk appetite.

But don’t be silly – rather buy me a coffee!

Happy not investing in Ponzi and pyramid schemes!